Some of my MS disabilities are invisible

Some of my MS disabilities are invisible

No one can see all my disabilities

Multiple sclerosis rules my life. Even when I think I am on the home run it will stick out a tentacle and trip me up. You too as well I guess. I have obvious disabilities such as walking, in fact I cannot walk unaided. Some of my MS disabilities are invisible. People will not know I have double vision unless I tell them but I’m acutely aware of it.

Disabilities caused by MS

It was about 20 years ago when I noticed little problems with my body would not go away. Instead they just got worse and worse. An occasional face plant without a tree root insight. Maybe the odd wobble as I walked down the corridor. Occasionally an emergency pit stop at the gents was necessary. These mild irritants persisted, grew and over the years have become very disabling.

Some of my MS disabilities are invisible

Now I cannot walk unaided so it’s either the sturdy Rollator or my funky mobility scooter aka TheTrike. I cannot stand on my feet for very long and Botox has eliminated the need for emergency pit stops. Other problems are now beginning to creep out of the shadows but they are elusive and invisible to the naked eye; invisible disabilities.

You can’t see double vision

For years my optician put prisms into my spectacles. I knew I had double vision but the prisms eliminated the problem completely. A couple of years ago my double vision outgrew the maximum strength prism that could be included into my glasses. Suddenly double vision was a serious matter and it is growing. The problem is worst when I’m reading so I now have to block the vision out my left eye, its very piratical.

A few months ago I was talking to a friend and I happened to mention that I had double vision.

She asked, “Do you get it in both eyes”?

“Well I do have two eyes so I suppose the answer is ‘Yes’” and laughed. She suddenly realised the stupidity of the question and chuckled as well, phew.

Doing up buttons

I’ve got two hands, 8 fingers and two thumbs. A couple of years ago, I started to have difficulty doing up the buttons of my shirt cuffs. It never crossed my mind this could be an MS thing. Oh no, I was wrong again. Very slowly the tentacles of MS have crept into all of my fingers. The fingertips are numb and the grip is unreliable. A few wine glasses have inexplicably crashed-landed onto the floor.

They look perfectly normal

No one looking at me would realise that my fingers and hands don’t work properly. It’s not easy to twirl spaghetti round a fork. My writing is illegible. I write a shopping list but then I cannot read it when I go out shopping. My left hand is getting weaker and weaker.

This is scary

Hey-ho, so I have disabilities you can see and those you can’t see. An even bigger surprise is that I have disabilities that other people know about but I don’t, honest. Yup, MS really is very confusing and some of my MS disabilities are invisible.

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June 2019

4 responses to “Some of my MS disabilities are invisible”

  1. Mark says:

    Buttons, cuff links, ties… Bah!

  2. Kay says:

    Thank you so much for writing this blog! It is brave, informative and although I don’t have MS helps me cope with what I do have. You and your time and talents are very much appreciated!

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